Six Ways to Really Annoy Your Human Companions

The following is from a blog that we follow.  It is written by Rufus, a retired racing greyhound.  Rufus has a lot of interesting things to say – he is one of our very favorite greyhounds!  He has given us permission to re-post from his blog.  If you enjoy this, you can follow Rufus by going to this link.

Rufus AnnoyingOkay, houndies, listen up. It’s payback time!

1. Don’t just pee on a fire hydrant; walk around it so as to get the leash caught in all those places where they put that heavy lubricating grease on the caps and valves. Your peeps will freak out!

2. Make sad eyes at them while they are eating, then slowly slink away to lie on your bed. This will induce severe guilt feelings, causing them to bolt down their food and get your dinner ready pronto. They may even add a little extra, just because you look especially hungry. Then when they call you to eat, feign indifference.

3. Make them walk fast to keep up with you; then suddenly stop and turn your body sideways into their path while you calmly sniff at something. They almost always fall for that one!

4. When they give you a cookie, make sure you let large chunks of it fall out of your mouth onto the ground. Then pretend you didn’t notice, and ignore their frantic attempts to direct your attention to the yummy pieces lying right at your feet. You get bonus points if they end up bending over, picking them up, and feeding them to you.

5. When crossing a busy street with your human companion, stop halfway across and give yourself a classic “whole body shake”. Or better yet, sit down in the middle of the road and scratch your ear with your hind leg. It never fails to annoy!

6. When scouting for a place to deliver a fragrant package, if you feel it’s going to be a real soft-serv, try to choose one of the following locations: in the middle of a sidewalk; on top of a low ornamental shrub on someone’s front lawn; on wood-chip mulch; or on a nice bed of dried pine needles (guaranteed to punch dozens of holes in any plastic bag used to clean it up)! Much hilarity ensues.

The best part of all this is that there’s no downside: Even after doing these things, the annoyance will fade. You’ll be forgiven and they’ll love the heck out of you just the same!

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